We all have those days when Debbie Downer pays us a visit. But for some of us it get’s so bad that everything that is wrong in one’s life get’s examined.
As a woman I have a lot of insecurities, like all woman do. But when those insecurities hit me, boy do they hit hard. It gets so bad that when I look in the mirror I do not see a pretty woman. I very much feel like an ugly colored woman. That does not have sleek hair or a perky nose. Thinking to myself, who would want someone like me. So Debbie reminds me of all the things I need to change about myself. This all being my physical appearance, because maybe if I was prettier people would treat me better. Rather than looking at someone with a resting bitch face, that they immediately assume are snobbish or thinks they are better than others.
This morning, when I thought about all the things that are important to me. I realized that I already have everything I need. And I though about listening to Debbie and her opinion about my looks. I asked my internal self, is how I look more important than my heart? I thought about what happened to the girl who wanted to save the world and if she cared about how she looked? The obstacles in her way? Or how she would fight adversity? For that girl, all those obstacles did not matter. Not even how she would get there, just that she would.
In life, it is very hard to be graceful after being kicked in the gut too many times. Looking people who you do not necessarily like in the eye and treating them with the necessary respect. I thought about how easy one lets Debbie tell her piece, while you have the power to silence her. Ones looks will never ever make up for a beautiful and graceful heart. Today I decided to kick Debbie’s ass. I am so grateful that I was born in the country I was born in. I appreciate my small and unconventional family, because most kids do not even know the love of a good mother. I am thankful for knowing such amazing people who has enriched my life so much.
I have found my inner voice and decided to write a different heart song. I will look in the mirror and say to myself, you may not be the prettiest biatch in the world, but you are still a very lucky and fortunate one.